Shameless Plugs...

Started blogging with some crafty friends, sharing ideas... so I suppose it's only right that I plug that site, too. And, the cuz started a blog, ran out of ideas, and returned to blogging again, so I suppose I should plug her blog.

Sorry if you were hoping for substance today, I don't really have any. Just blogs.

The Knlog- a crafty bunch
...this girl's life...- my super cute cousin

Holy Batman!

It's almost 2010... so that means we have to agree on a few things. Like, how are we all going to pronounce it? I don't need a majority vote here, I need the facts because I desire to be all things cool I'm educating America's youth, I need to know.


Is it twenty-ten or two thousand ten?


What will you lovelies be calling it?? 

Only in Michigan..

Totally just saw a man purse, mullet, fu manchu, AND a fringed leather trench coat on a dude in a restaurant.

I heart Kalamazoo, Michigan.

But I hate that I didn't have the stealth factor it required to snap a picture for you all. Because I love you all dearly, I decided to make my own version of what he looked like. And yes, I totally used paint because I'm cool like that. I think it actually adds some character to Mr. Fu.

"Hey Ladies, I'm single and ready to mingle!"

And yes, I totally had to look up the correct way to spell fu manchu. The first grade teacher in me wanted it to be three words or one word, but certainly not two words.

2010

In light of the craziness that has been my life the past few months, I feel like now is a good time to set some goals for myself. These are things I hope to accomplish this coming year. Things that I may not have been able to accomplish prior to my current situation, or things I may never have dreamed of until now.

So here it is.. in pictures (and words for you less visual readers).. my goals for 2010.

1) Travel to three new places.
I love to travel, but I often find myself returning to places I've already been. I already have a trip to Atlanta planned, so that is why I'm pushing myself to try three new places. They don't have to be huge excursions, just want to get myself out of my comfort zone, try something new, and hopefully find a new place to treasure.

2) Go skydiving.
(credit: Skydive Orange)

I enjoy flying and I am a thrill seeker. I'm pretty sure this is right up my alley. Plus, I have a friend or two who might be willing to join me.

3) Share a meal with a complete stranger.
(the people in this picture are not strangers, they are just strange-- it's my family!)

This could be completed in many different ways. It may be a date, a new friend, or just a stranger I see in a restaurant. I don't care. I just want to share a meal with a stranger.
We should, however have an emergency back up plan. How about this-- if I leave a blog post with nothing in it, you know I'm about to be killed by a complete stranger and call the police for me. Deal?

4) Make someone's day, everyday.

I have had an outpouring of support from family and friends these past two months, now I can return the favor. Just a smile in someone's direction, or heartwarming words when they are down... something to make their day.

*All images belong to me or my family, except skydiving.

Bitter Betsy, Party of 1

Okay.. more bitterness. I would apologize, but it's my blog and I need an outlet.

First of all, yesterday was our anniversary. I had grand plans of hanging out with friends, enjoying the snowfall, drinking a beer or five, and genuinely enjoying my time with friends (who have become my family because I'm 500 miles from family).

Then? Mother Nature decided to rear her ugly face and dump us with almost two feet of snow, leaving all of metro DC paralyzed. Leaving me alone, feeling trapped and pretty down in the dumps. Thankfully, my fabulous neighbors swooped in and invited me over for some coffee and company. I was very thankful to talk to someone other than the Little Dog. She's great company and all, but being snowed in was enough to make me want to go ca-ra-zy!

Now? I'm all sorts of sad about having to leave Little Dog for a while. She's going back home with him for the holidays because he's driving and I'm flying. So now we're trying to figure out how to do the dog transfer with all this snow. I'm plowed in, so I can't get out.. meaning he'll probably have to come get her. Is it bad that I asked him to bring a shovel and at least help me get out? I figure it's the least he can do, after all. And talking to him makes me want to scream.. so I can only imagine what seeing him face to face will be like.

Plus, I'm super sad about not being able to see his family this year. I love them like they are my own and always look forward to Christmas Eve at his grandparents. Now I won't even get to see them again. Who knew, last year was my last Christmas with them? I certainly didn't. I know it'll be an adjustment period and new traditions will start, but this has been what I've done for the past 5 years. I will certainly miss it this year.

The silver lining in all of this? I'm surrounded by wonderful friends and will get to see my family in just a few days (even if I'm pretty much a scrooge this year-- divorce will do that to you).

Blah.

This divorce BS is really quite obnoxious. It plays with my emotions like whoa. And? I'm finding I'm pretty annoyed with those I see who are tra, la, la'ing along all in love. I pretty much want to play red rover when I see them holding hands. It's nothing against them, honestly. I'm just a little, tiny bit bitter.


Just when I thought I was in a good place, (wanting to play red rover is much better than where I was a few weeks ago, trust me.) the freakin' vet calls to check on Big Dog (you know, the dog he has) and make sure she's doing better. It's really awesome to have to fess up to some random vet tech that my marriage is over and that I really have no idea how my dog is doing. My dog. Our dog. His dog, now.


However, there are some ups. The dishes in the sink? Oh, that's right.. there aren't any. Because I put them in the dishwasher immediately. Everything is right where I put it. (This might backfire when I don't have anyone to blame for misplacing something, but we'll cross that bridge when we get there.) And, the laundry has significanly decreased. Plus, I use waaaaaay less toilet paper, paper towels, shampoo, soap, etc.


Cooking for one, though? A royal pain. I LOVE cooking. I love cooking for others. And I love sharing a meal with someone and talking about my day. Even though I didn't always enjoy my company, I had someone to cook for. Now? It's just me. Zoey (the dog) doesn't appreciate my cooking, as she's not allowed human food. I suppose it's hard to appreciate something you've never tasted and know you can't have. However, I have been able to enjoy cereal for dinner or a baked potato-- I don't think you can do that when you're married.

I promise, I'm really trying not to be bitter.

Best Put Down Ever

By far, one of my favorite put downs EVER...

"You're a stupid, fat, old lady who eats poop for breakfast!"

Let's analyze this.. stupid? Only because I keep returning to see your smiling face daily, but I really need the money. Fat? You got that right, buddy. I love me some chips. Old? Older than you, yes. Older than your mother? Yes. Older than dirt? Nope. Eats poop for breakfast? Nope, only for dinner.

And that my friends, is the joy of working with children. I know you're jealous you don't get compliments like that on a regular basis.

Edited to add: Google just recommended to me, "Yo Mama Jokes! Find the best mama jokes on the internet."

Really?

Dear Zoey,

I would love it if you could find a place to do your business. I mean, do you really need to wander around for 15 minutes in the rain to find the perfect place to relieve yourself? I mean really. It's raining. You hate the rain. I hate the rain. You're muddy. I'm muddy. Just go.

I get that you're still trying to get used to your new surroundings, so am I. But it's just unacceptable to be walking around in the rain, snow, wind, frigid temps, etc. for longer than 2 minutes.

Thank you for your understanding.

Love,
Your Mom

You What?

This is how my morning went yesterday...

I had a little one absent the day before. I assumed it was because he had a dr. appointment or he was sick. Well, when he came in I asked him why he was absent. He walked over to me a quietly whispered, 'I had to go to the hospital!'. Knowing that he has a flair for the dramatic, I asked for details. He then whispered, 'I had a paperclip stuck in my butt.' Not fully understanding, I asked for clarification. 'Was it in like the part you sit on or the part you poop from?'. Keep in mind, I'm dealing with a 7 year old...He replied, 'The part you poop from and the doctor had to look at it and try to get it out. It was really stuck and now it hurts to poop.'

Allow me to clarify. He had a paperclip up his butt. A paperclip. Up. His. Butt. I suppose you might be wondering why, as I clearly was. He said he put it up there because he couldn't poop.

And now back to our regularly scheduled program...

I have about a month's worth of stories from the front line. I'll try and remember as much as I can, but the recent events have caused me to pretty much forget everything. Seriously, I cannot for the life of me remember anything. This even pertains to really, really, really super important things like appointments, meetings, birthdays, bills, etc.

Li'l Man: Mrs. L, there's wawer on da counner. (translation: there's water on the counter)
Me: I see it, buddy. I'll wipe it up.
Li'l Man: No, it happ'n when someone wed da pants.
Me: Someone wet their pants? How did I miss this?! (turning to the class) Who wet their pants on the counter?
Li'l Man: No, no, no. It happ'n when somebody waddered da pwants.
Me: Ohhh.. when someone watered the plants? Gotcha.

Oops. That's right. Because it would totally not make any sense for someone to wet their pants on the counter. My bad.

Update

I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!

Hopefully, you haven't forgotten about me. While I've been gone, I really missed all of you. I'm hoping now that things have settled down a bit, I will be a better blogger.

To update you all, approximately four weeks ago my husband and I made the difficult decision to separate with the intentions of getting a divorce. I have had my ups and downs during these past few weeks and continue to chug along in the process.

Just a warning for you all: I am one moody woman. My life is, essentially, an emotional roller coaster. One minute I'm happy as a lark. The next minute? BAM! I'm crying for what appears to be no apparent reason.

Please bear with me in this process.